First we watched American Idol. Then we watched Angel. Then we watched a new show that debuted last night. It's called America Lays The Smack Down on Saddam's Candy Ass. It's gonna be on for the next few nights, and I predict it will be intensely watchable. The sequel, America Makes Itself At Home In Saddam's Living Room, will probably not be as good, but it might be on several networks for a long time.

Speaking of television, this commercial came on the other night. In it, these two hip young people are sitting on a couch. The girl picks up a piece of candy and pops it in her mouth, still in its wrapper. While the boy watches she works it around in her mouth, then pulls the candyless wrapper out of her mouth with a sexy little snarl. The boy looks like he's about to make a mess in his pants.

"Ewww," I said, "there's gonna be slobber all over that wrapper."

"You have issues with saliva, don't you?" Sonya asked.