26 February 2002


The old guys at the gym continue to amuse.

We have the Muzak in the locker room, right? And I don't think management really cares about it or tries to be too consistent, because sometimes it's all dance music, and sometimes it's pop, or R&B, or country, or classic rock. I think they just spin the dial every morning, and whatever it lands on is what we listen to. Who cares, right? It's Muzak.

I'll tell you who cares: the old guys.

Today, the Muzak was kind of hard rockin', indie-pop-punk type stuff. Nothing I'd heard before, utterly forgettable.

"What is this crap?" I heard the old guy grouse a row of lockers over.

"Good Lord, this is just great, isn't it?"

"What are they saying? I can't understand a word!"

"My kids are in their twenties and they don't listen to this crap!"

"Dominate? Eliminate? That's great. We really need to be hearing this."

"Rape the system? I can't believe it!"

[I actually think they said "rage at the system," pops.]

"This is terrible! We shouldn't have to listen to this! I'm gonna go lodge a complaint with the management right now."

Laughter all around the locker room. Even some of the other old guys thought this one was funny.

"Do you have any idea how much of a stereotype it is for an old guy to complain about the music kids listen to today?" I wanted to go ask him, "I mean, no one complains about rock lyrics anymore. How 1986."