The departure from AALAS was uneventful. The last week there I worked like a dog, trying to leave nothing undone. It didn't happen, but nobody will figure out what I left undone for months. My conscience has given me minimal grief about this.

One interesting thing did happen during that last week, though. I rear-ended somebody. Hard. I had just taken the Walnut Grove East exit off of I-240. For those of you not familiar with Memphis traffic, the 240/Walnut Grove overpass is a magnet for fenderbenders of all types. I got to the top of the ramp, stopped when the guy in front of me stopped, then after he left I looked to make sure it was clear and took off.

Right into his ass.

Of course he was driving a great big Ford F-150, while I was in my little Mitsubishi truck. I pushed dude ahead a few feet, but that's about all the damage I did to him. But now my grill is cracked, by front bumper is crooked, and I've got a broken turn signal. The entire front of my truck, actually, looks somewhat snaggled.

Dude got out of his truck and said, "how the hell did you catch up with me? I hit the gas!"

I shook my head and grinned like a moron. I was thinking cops, insurance people, and this guy's neck hurting. I was most dejected.

And then he said, "man, my truck's okay, it's your fault and I got to get to work. That okay with you?" And he headed back for his truck.

I thanked him profusely and drove off as fast as I could.

I got Sonya back from Texas, too, even though the damn Texans were sorry to give her up. It was one of my more interesting road-trips across Arkansas, to tell the truth. We had a cool little interlude that had me dashing into every place that looked like a drug store in Lonoke, Arkansas. It was a little adventure.

I'm not really an impulse buyer, but last week I gave in to temptation on numerous occasions. I got three CD's, if you can believe that: Black Flag, Edie Brickell and Duran Duran (for Sonya). I also got a new book about The Crow - entitled The Lazarus Heart - by Poppy Brite, of all people. The girl is twisted in a totally far-out way, y'all. This was one sick, sick book. Murder, homosexuality, incest, transgenderism, madness, hatred...all set during a hurricane in New Orleans. Read this book, kids - it's gross!

Went to a Business After Hours with Sonya last Thursday at this swanky joint in Cordova. Excellent food, free drinks (somehow I kept finding tickets) and the rich entertainment of watching Memphis' business elite do some pre-weekend butt-sniffing. A pretty girl (or good-looking guy) would walk in the room and I swear it was like dropping a t-bone in a shark tank. In the words of Chandler, "it's not as graceful as the Ice Capades, but when Snoopy falls down - funny!"

Last Friday I saw The Truman Show. Neat. Jim Carrey can act. That was a scary-ass movie, you know? And funny, too. Ed Harris is perfect. In everything.

Last Saturday was the Fourth o' July, so I did the annual family ritual of going to my sister's aprtment. Her apartment has this sweeping, majestic view of the Mississippi - and it's so high up the fireworks explode at eye level. I drank a lot of beer and had a splendid time.

I've also ridden the trolley like, 32 times in the last few days on round trips at lunch. It's nice having my PB&J stash close to the office. And you see such interesting people on the trolley in the middle of the day! Have you ever seen Seven, the Brad Pitt horror/thriller from a few years ago? Remember the dead/not-dead guy tied to the bed? I saw a woman on the trolley with teeth just like his on Tuesday. She asked me what time it was. I shrieked like a woman and pounced out an open window.

Some things you just can't share public transportation with.

Weekend plans? Saturday Night Fever at the Orpheum tonight, and I'm thinking I may clean the kitchen.

Blinking text - don't you just hate it?

Anyway, I just went outside for my morning smoke break and this homeless guy - in a t-shirt proudly proclaiming his Polish heritage, no less - came up to me and bummed a light. He had these incredible stains on his front teeth from what I can only assume is smoking crack. He wanted to know if I was working hard.

Yes, Downtown is Memphis.

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