20 January 2003


I needed some black pants, so I went shopping today.

We went to the Riverwalk, and I walked through Eddie Bauer and Gap and Structure, but I thought to myself, "I can do better."

So we went to Sak's!

Sonya went downstairs for some make-up and stuff, so I started in on the hip-young-man section. I tried some black jeans. It seems the designers want you to wear jeans that will show your pubic hair.

I tried on one pair that the tag said would fit me. I couldn't get them buttoned, they barely covered my genitals and they squeezed my thighs sausage-tight until billowing out in a flared puddle on the floor.

These were not cheap jeans, either.

And Gianni Versace was showing me no love. I kept skipping up a size, because I would have liked some Versace jeans, but I gave up when I couldn't even get the 44" waist jeans buttoned. Perhaps it wasn't forty-four inches, but some exotic (and tiny) European measurement.

I got the Hugo Boss pants instead, in a non-fatboy size. I like them just fine.